so i'm writing this now (so late? so earlY?) only because i've been fortunate (or un-?) to find myself in an introspective mood. i don't want to be that guy that beats around the bush with people as i've often been. i don't want to be dragging people around, being socialable un-had acquaintances with every guy on the block. what i mean to say is, i want to try and begin to learn to be someone that can know themself to see a feeling in them and then, by choice, commit to it. own it. i really enjoyed having lunch with you and chatting, cuddling too on that dreary day. and i want to commit to the feeling of saying that i do not want to pursue anything more than a friendship with you. cuddling is always nice, but i hate-- i hate-- being-- ...having dragged it out for so many people i've truly grown to care about. i want to tell you this so i won't leave you waiting around for more. because i just don't think i'm in a state to give you more right now. i'll apologize for not being the gutsy guy to say something like this over the phone, or in person even. but i really do want to give you that, that honesty, as i'm figuring it out for myself.
as you can see i'm still very much in a lifepath of figuring myself out, if that can ever be done. most people tell me to just relax and let it be. we'll see though. stay tuned.
skip to main |
skip to sidebar
